instructions

   this is your conspiracy theory. mutter it in bars, scream it on street corners, keep it to yourself for fear of reprisals from MI5, do what you want with it. good luck.

   please note: we can't guarantee a coherent theory. it may even be self-contradictory. this hasn't mattered to generations of conspiracy theorists, why should it matter to you?

theory

   "A rogue A.I. is stealing people so that it can bring us all under the sway of an inhuman cabal of evil genii by putting them into a computer simulation where they have to track Boris Yeltsin to a secret base near the Texas School Book Depository. The mental power thus produced by the captive thinkers allows MI5, in league with the AI, to compromise Marilyn Manson allowing MI5 to bring us all under the sway of a despotic ruler. "

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