instructions

   this is your conspiracy theory. mutter it in bars, scream it on street corners, keep it to yourself for fear of reprisals from the CIA, do what you want with it. good luck.

   please note: we can't guarantee a coherent theory. it may even be self-contradictory. this hasn't mattered to generations of conspiracy theorists, why should it matter to you?

theory

   "Why can't anyone see that the Pope is being mind conrolled by the CIA? It's all so that the Venusian commander-in-chief, hidden in a secret HQ near London can create a race of slaves. After that, the CIA will create a race of robot overlords when the disorder caused by the Venusian commander-in-chief reaches a peak. The only thing we can do is let the monks of Shangri-La put together a militia to stop them. "

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