instructions

   this is your conspiracy theory. mutter it in bars, scream it on street corners, keep it to yourself for fear of reprisals from the Martian commander-in-chief, do what you want with it. good luck.

   please note: we can't guarantee a coherent theory. it may even be self-contradictory. this hasn't mattered to generations of conspiracy theorists, why should it matter to you?

theory

   "Obviously the Martian commander-in-chief is carrying out a covert war against the armies of Osama bin Laden in Saigon. Very soon the Martian envoy, who is currently only supplying weapons to the Martian commander-in-chief, will join in. David Shayler has a number of nuclear devices hidden in the Everglades which the Martian envoy is trying to steal to help win the war and subvert the justice system for nefarious. We must help Robocop to stop them, or we are all doomed! "

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