instructions

   this is your conspiracy theory. mutter it in bars, scream it on street corners, keep it to yourself for fear of reprisals from Tony Blair, do what you want with it. good luck.

   please note: we can't guarantee a coherent theory. it may even be self-contradictory. this hasn't mattered to generations of conspiracy theorists, why should it matter to you?

theory

   "Isn't it obvious that David Shayler has been killed by Tony Blair and replaced by an agent of the Venusian envoy who has undergone extensive plastic surgery? Clearly Tony Blair is planning to bring about a new Great Flood when the agent of the Venusian envoy assassinates Monica Lewinsky. The only solution is for our Martian protectors to stop Tony Blair and the Venusian envoy, which is impossible unless the United Nations will pass a resolution to allow the public to own nuclear devices. "

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