instructions

   this is your conspiracy theory. mutter it in bars, scream it on street corners, keep it to yourself for fear of reprisals from the Venusian envoy, do what you want with it. good luck.

   please note: we can't guarantee a coherent theory. it may even be self-contradictory. this hasn't mattered to generations of conspiracy theorists, why should it matter to you?

theory

   "Obviously the Venusian envoy is carrying out a covert war against the armies of Col. Ghadaffi in a disused Welsh coal mine. Very soon MI6, who is currently only supplying weapons to the Venusian envoy, will join in. Ian Paisley has a number of nuclear devices hidden in Dreamland which MI6 is trying to steal to help win the war and pave the way for an alien invasion. We must help Elvis to stop them, or we are all doomed! "

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