instructions

   this is your conspiracy theory. mutter it in bars, scream it on street corners, keep it to yourself for fear of reprisals from the Martian ambassador, do what you want with it. good luck.

   please note: we can't guarantee a coherent theory. it may even be self-contradictory. this hasn't mattered to generations of conspiracy theorists, why should it matter to you?

theory

   "Isn't it obvious that Marilyn Manson has been killed by the Martian ambassador and replaced by an agent of Saddam Hussein who has undergone extensive plastic surgery? Clearly the Martian ambassador is planning to enslave the Human Race when the agent of Saddam Hussein assassinates Richard Tomlinson. The only solution is for Rambo to stop the Martian ambassador and Saddam Hussein, which is impossible unless Congress will pass a resolution to allow the public to own biological weapons. "

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