instructions

   this is your conspiracy theory. mutter it in bars, scream it on street corners, keep it to yourself for fear of reprisals from Slobodan Milosevic, do what you want with it. good luck.

   please note: we can't guarantee a coherent theory. it may even be self-contradictory. this hasn't mattered to generations of conspiracy theorists, why should it matter to you?

theory

   "Why can't anyone see that Salman Rushdie is being followed by Slobodan Milosevic? It's all so that MI6, hidden in a secret HQ near Roswell can create a race of robot overlords. After that, Slobodan Milosevic will hide the evidence of alien visitations when the disorder caused by MI6 reaches a peak. The only thing we can do is let our Venusian protectors put together a militia to stop them. "

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