instructions

   this is your conspiracy theory. mutter it in bars, scream it on street corners, keep it to yourself for fear of reprisals from the Alpha Centauri Expeditionary Force, do what you want with it. good luck.

   please note: we can't guarantee a coherent theory. it may even be self-contradictory. this hasn't mattered to generations of conspiracy theorists, why should it matter to you?

theory

   "Obviously the Alpha Centauri Expeditionary Force is carrying out a covert war against the armies of David Shayler in the Alps. Very soon Tony Blair, who is currently only supplying weapons to the Alpha Centauri Expeditionary Force, will join in. Marilyn Manson has a number of nuclear devices hidden in Dreamland which Tony Blair is trying to steal to help win the war and bring world civilisation to an end. We must help Elvis to stop them, or we are all doomed! "

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