instructions

   this is your conspiracy theory. mutter it in bars, scream it on street corners, keep it to yourself for fear of reprisals from Charlton Heston, do what you want with it. good luck.

   please note: we can't guarantee a coherent theory. it may even be self-contradictory. this hasn't mattered to generations of conspiracy theorists, why should it matter to you?

theory

   "The local tax office is a front for the evil works of Charlton Heston. It's part of a national chain of illegal racketeering outlets, whose final aim is to hide the evidence of the fake misson to the Moon. They've already claimed victims - everyone from the Pope to Osama bin Laden have been caught out. Only George Bush has seen through the scam, which is why Saddam Hussein, in cahoots with Charlton Heston, is trying to hide the evidence of alien visitations with a view to putting an end to George Bush. "

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